What you need to know about domestic violence
April 10 in the Moscow City Hall held a round table "New legislative initiatives in addressing the problem of domestic violence", which discussed ways to solve one of the serious problems of our society. We went to a round table, and also asked experts about what domestic violence really is, where it comes from and how to deal with it at the public and state levels. In the following article we will tell you what to do if this problem has directly affected you or your friends.
For their help in preparing the material and consultation, the editors thank Maria Mokhova, Director of the Independent Charitable Center for Assistance to Survivors of Sexual Abuse Sisters, specialists from the ANNA National Center for the Prevention of Violence and Natalia Khodyreva, Ph.D.
What is "domestic violence"?
There are several options for identifying the problem: "domestic violence", "family" or "affiliate". The phrase itself implies that this violence occurs between people in a personal relationship - spouses or partners, sometimes formerly and not necessarily living together, regardless of whether the couple is heterosexual or homosexual. It is very important to distinguish a family conflict, which is a one-off character, and partner violence — regularly recurring or increasing incidents that follow a specific pattern.
Conflict, no matter how acute, goes into the category of domestic violence only when it occurs at least twice in the same way. The principal difference is that the family conflict is local isolated and arises on the basis of a specific problem that it is theoretically possible to resolve, for example, with the help of a psychologist or a lawyer. Simply put, conflict has a beginning and an end. Affiliate violence is a system of behavior of one family member towards another, based on power and control. It does not have a specific reason, except for the fact that one of the partners seeks to control the behavior and feelings of the other and to suppress him as a person at different levels.
What types of domestic violence exist?
Under domestic violence in society is commonly understood physical violence, it is assault. Indeed, this is one of the most common types of domestic violence: according to the ANNA crisis center, every third Russian woman is beaten by her husband or partner. Physical violence includes not only beatings, but also restraining, suffocation, causing burns and other methods of causing bodily harm, including murder. However, there are other types of domestic violence: sexual, psychological and economic.
Sexy domestic violence is coercion to sexual acts by force, blackmail or threats. According to the results of studies conducted in Russia in 1996 and 2000, approximately every fourth Russian woman husbands are forced into sexual relations against their will. This is directly related to the idea of sex as a “marital duty” that a woman should perform regardless of her desire, and the general idea of the dynamics of sexual relations in which a woman “gives” and the man “takes.” Psychological violence is systematic insults, blackmail, threats, manipulation. Its subtype is violence involving children, from using children as hostages to threats to harm children if the partner does not obey. Economic - it is depriving one of the partners of financial freedom, from hiding incomes to situations in which one partner completely takes away the salary of another and does not allow him to participate in making financial decisions. The problem is that physical or sexual violence can be proved and they are crimes, but economic and psychological violence is not. It is not uncommon for one of the partners to use all types of violence at the same time.
Why is it believed that women are mainly affected by domestic violence?
The types of violence that can be identified (that is, physical and sexual) are mainly affected by women. According to statistics from the Ministry of Internal Affairs for 2013, women make up 91.6% of victims of violent crimes against their spouse. "Among the victims of violence from spouses or partners, the number of women exceeds the number of men by about 9 times. Women receive 8 times more serious bodily and other injuries from their partners than men. Male violence most often carries a practical purpose or expressive (expression of emotions) Women more often resort to physical violence when they feel cornered and are desperate to prevent further torture. Extremely rarely violence by women is systematic, purposeful, permanent, "explains Nat Aliya Khodyreva.
On the other hand, women are more likely to experience methods of emotional and economic violence. For example, a wife may seek to control all household spending and systematically humiliate her husband because of low earnings. However, a woman can also be a physical aggressor, for example, in relation to children. There may be a hierarchy of power in the family, where a man is the strongest, abuses power and applies violence, and women, in turn, apply it to children.
Is there a link between domestic violence and the financial and social level of the family?
There is an opinion that only dysfunctional families are subject to domestic violence, and there is no such problem in well-off and educated couples. This is not true. According to a study conducted by the Council of Women of Moscow State University, 61.6% of disadvantaged families and 38.4% of prosperous people are confronted with domestic violence. At the same time, families with low incomes and low levels of education often have problems related to alcoholism and the use of physical violence. In families with a high level of education, but low income, economic and psychological violence are more developed (sophisticated psychological manipulations, etc.). Domestic violence in high-income families is most often physical and sexual in nature.
The point is also that in dysfunctional families the problem of violence is more noticeable, since these families may be visited by social workers or wards, for example, because of the child’s behavior. Domestic partner murders also occur more often in marginalized families, for whom the drinking-squabble-knife scheme is eerily typical. Similar stories penetrate the press, become material for reporting, with photos, names, private stories. To get into the "status" layers in this way is impossible: until it comes to cruel reprisal or murder, no one suspects anything.
What are the causes of domestic violence?
The main and most dangerous misconception that exists in society regarding the problem of domestic violence is that the reason lies in the actions of the injured partner, and the rapist was "provoked." From here an erroneous question "for what?" and the tendency to seek justification for the aggressor. It must be remembered that there is no and cannot be a behavioral reason for systematic violence — only the abuser’s tendency toward aggression and manifestation of his power over a partner is to blame.
This inclination directly depends on the upbringing and family relations scheme, which the person "inherited", observing the relations of his parents, as well as on attitudes that prevail in society as a whole, and in particular, in the couple's environment. For example, the likelihood of domestic violence increases, if a woman and her acquaintances prefer not to discuss the topic of violence and not to seek help, and the husband and his friends do not condemn the use of force. The problem is rooted both in the taboo theme of domestic violence, and in the patriarchal nature of Russian culture, enshrined even at the level of “popular wisdom” and traditional values: “A man is the head of everything,” “Let the wife be afraid of her husband.” The family economy is also structured in such a way that with the birth of children a woman often falls into a state of dependence on who brings money into the house.
“The idea that a woman is“ breaking out ”is common, alas, among many of my fellow psychologists,” notes Natalia Khodyreva. According to her, Russian society is characterized by militaristic consciousness — it is believed that for any disobedience physical punishment should be used or shouting. Therefore, rapists are not inclined to see problems in their behavior.
How is domestic violence different from any other, and why does this problem require a special approach?
First, in the case of domestic violence, the injured partner is in constant contact with the abuser and often depends on him economically. With the man who hit you on the street, do not have to see each other and sleep in the same room. In situations of domestic violence, victims often do not have the opportunity to find housing, and to constantly communicate with the abuser means to be subjected to violence again. Public stereotypes that prevent them from breaking off relations with the abuser are crushing on women in unhealthy relationships: “children need a father”, “not to destroy the family”. Another dangerous misconception that follows from the tradition of blaming the victim is the illusion that if a woman or a man behaves “better” and finds an approach to a partner, then the violence against them will cease.
There are also psychological factors - after a long relationship with constant pressure, threats, often beatings, the Stockholm syndrome develops. As a psychological defense, the victim begins to believe that the aggressor takes pity if he unconditionally fulfills his demands, and tries to justify his actions by building an emotional connection with him.
How is the problem of domestic violence solved at the level of legislation?
Unfortunately, at the moment there is no special law on domestic violence in Russia. Most often, the articles of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation are applied to situations of domestic violence: 111 ("Intentional infliction of grievous bodily harm"), 112 ("Intentional infliction of moderately serious harm to health"), 115 ("Intentional infliction of mild harm to health") 116 ("Beat") and 119 ("The threat of murder or the infliction of grievous bodily harm"). According to a study conducted by the ANNA center, it is very difficult to prove cases of domestic violence, even physical, under current legislation. The problem is aggravated by the fact that the victims are often not interested in initiating proceedings against their partner, especially if they think that there is still an opportunity to save the family. They turn to the police because they want to stop the violence "at the moment", in the hope that it will never happen again.
But even if the affected partner is ready to finish the job, there are obstacles. Cases under articles 115 and 116 relate to private prosecution cases, that is, the prosecution is not initiated by the prosecutor on behalf of the state, but by the victim or her representatives. “The victim herself must act as an accusation — she herself collects evidence, assigns an examination, collect testimony from witnesses, etc. In reality, however, a woman is often unable herself even to file an application without the support of a lawyer — it is not accepted the first time. And if it comes to they try to reconcile her with the rapist, and the woman gets a new round of violence instead of protection, ”said Alexey Parshin, a lawyer of the Moscow Chamber of Attorneys and a member of the working group on the draft law“ On Prevention and Prevention tic of domestic violence ", at a round table on the discussion of the bill.
In addition, in Russian legislation there is no concept of a protective order - a court order that prohibits or restricts the contact of the abuser with the victim. It turns out that a person who has been subjected to domestic violence is likely to be defenseless from all sides.
What do crisis centers do?
The victims need psychological rehabilitation programs, social housing, protection programs with high risks of death threats, compensation for damage, and programs for children who witness family violence. Now in Russia there are state and non-profit organizations involved in helping victims of domestic violence, but there are very few of them - less than 0.5% of all social institutions deal with this problem. At the same time, “optimization” of social institutions is taking place, shelters and emergency telephone numbers are being closed. Most government agencies can only help people who have a registration of the desired city or region, while those who are injured without a registration are more likely to have nowhere to go. The hospital of the Moscow "Crisis Center for Women and Children" can only be accessed from social security. As a result, the victims are left without state protection at the most difficult moment - immediately after the act of violence. In this situation, you can apply for asylum only in non-state crisis centers.
For men, who most often are the initiators of violence, in turn, in the world there are preventive programs. Within their framework, boys and young men are explained what consent to sexual contact, respect for women and girls is, what actions are violent and why. For adult male aggressors, psychocorrection courses are conducted. In Russia, there are only one such courses - the voluntary program "Alternative to Violence", which is conducted by "Men of the XXI Century".
How to improve the situation in Russia?
This is a long-term systematic work, which includes both the introduction of the relevant law and its implementation, and the education of specialists and the whole society. Work is needed to improve the quality of life, aimed at the safety and health of citizens. It is important to remove the taboo from the very topic of domestic violence, to explain to the victims that they are not guilty and should not be ashamed of being bullied. Publicity will help gradually change public opinion, which is especially important in a situation where the legal system is unable to adequately respond to incidents of domestic violence.
A draft law on the prevention of domestic violence is currently being drafted, which is pending in the Russian government. It involves the transfer of all cases of private prosecution to private-public, the introduction of preventive accounting, preventive conversations, protective orders and judicial protection orders, as well as specialized programs for survivors of violence and for rapists. The offender, in particular, will be asked to leave the place of cohabitation, regardless of who owns it, to transfer personal belongings and property to the affected partner, if they have been withheld, to have to pay for the costs of treatment, counseling and housing if the victim moves out.
The bill does not offer any separate special punishment for domestic rapists - all responsibility is provided for in accordance with the articles, for example, on bodily harm. It is fundamentally important that this bill authorizes the district police officers to react and record all cases of domestic violence in their area, as well as conduct preventive conversations with the rapist after the first signal of violence. The abuser should be informed that after the second signal there will be administrative responsibility, and after the third one he will be considered a repeat offender. As Maria Mokhova emphasizes, the state is obliged to inform its citizens that this is not “my wife: I want to love, I want to kill”, but this is a person and a member of society and the use of violence against him is prohibited and punishable.
What is the situation in other countries?
Currently, in 89 countries there are some legislative provisions directly aimed at combating domestic violence, and in some countries (USA, Australia) there are also special articles on marital rape. Some states have adopted comprehensive laws on violence against women, providing for a range of legal protections. Some former republics of the USSR — Ukraine, Kyrgyzstan, Moldova, Georgia — have also adopted laws aimed at combating domestic violence.
In the USA, where the system of fighting and preventing domestic violence is highly developed, about three thousand women die a year. In Russia, this figure is three to four times more, despite the fact that the population of Russia is two times less. International legal practice is to be guided primarily by the nature of the acts of violence, and not the relationship between the perpetrator and the victim. Moreover, domestic violence by a husband represents a serious threat to the life and health of a woman, as she is often forced to live with him even after a divorce or during the investigation.
The main elements of assistance faced with domestic violence, which are absent or poorly developed in Russia, but are actively used and developed in the world: protective warrants, crisis and rehabilitation centers and social shelters where survivors can spend the night and get food. В ряде стран, в отличие от России, существует и механизм защитного ордера, когда враждующие стороны прежде всего сепарируют друг от друга, чтобы сохранить жизни людей. У нас же, напротив, существует практика примирения сторон в суде. Как отмечает Мария Мохова, "в России в среднем отрываются от насильника за семь раз - уходят и возвращаются. Бывает дольше".
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