Sex is: How the press talked about it with teenagers in the USSR
IN RUSSIA, A SINGLE TABLE OF SEX TALKS IS EXISTENT TO THE NEXT and more often almost official calls for abstinence are heard. Puritanism, among other things, we inherited from the USSR. True, even in the Soviet Union with teenagers they tried to talk about sex several times. We understand how the censored Soviet press dealt with this.
From “getting married” to teen
In the 1920s in the USSR, attitudes toward sex were undergoing a liberal turn. They do not condemn free sexual relations, even condemn the attempts of one of the partners to bind the other to themselves: "You are comrades," "You have no rights to her," "You should not bind him and deprive public life," wrote in 1923 in the official Party newspaper "Worker".
The newspaper also publishes articles about the genital organs of women with illustrations, talk about menstruation with an appeal not to be afraid of them and, if necessary, to consult a doctor. The press quietly uses the terms: if the article is devoted to the genitals, it means that there will be the words "vagina", "uterus", "menstruation", "menopause". The "Women's Journal" debunked the myths about defloration (as it could, of course), was horrified how barbarically they used to treat the first night: "The first intercourse was accompanied by a girl's rupture of the hymen (defloration). In ancient times this act was considered disgusting ... In some ways, the manifestation of sadism is a man. For some peoples (Chinese, some African nations, for peoples in India) this is considered such a shameful thing that committing it is paid for with money. Some wild tribes of Africa and Asia have a ritual of cutting the girls, which is made by the priest on the festival of spring. "
The magazine also said that it is necessary to change attitudes towards virginity: "Women in European countries, in order to save themselves from possible deformity and avoid pain and suffering at such a significant point in their life, before the marriage, cut the hymen by means of a small operation a doctor. For our country, this is a matter of the future. But I think that the modern new woman(in the yard in 1927. - Approx. Ed.) she will not lag behind the European woman in this respect: she has already outlived a lot of wild customs and prejudices in the field of sexual life. A certificate from the doctor about the operation of this operation will always eliminate the conflict that may occur. "
"It does not follow, talking with children about the personal life of a person, without an urgent need to affect the field of intimate relations," the Worker quotes Makarenko in 1956.
It would seem, what have teenagers to do with - such articles were devoted to those who are getting married and those who are potentially ready for this. But age, when it was permissible to marry, in those years were considered sixteen years for women and eighteen for men. That is, the advice to check for infections before having sex with a new partner, to know everything about menstruation and not to be afraid of the gynecologist were designed specifically for adolescents. The decades of silence that followed have raised these questions to the level of taboos for both children and adults.
Gradually, the age of marriage increases, sex education is directed not only at the newlyweds, but also at the ordinary teenager and becomes the task of the family. “Nor should we talk with children about a person’s personal life, without an urgent need to affect the field of intimate relationships. Here we must exercise greater restraint and sensitivity,” the Worker quotes Makarenko in 1956. “But if the young people still have questions character, you have to answer them. It is better to talk about it with the young man to the father, and to the mother to talk about the girls. "
There is also a clear gender division in the issue of parenting. Together with the statement “what a father can give, for simple natural reasons, a mother cannot give” the approach itself is changing: boys and girls need to be brought up differently. Sex education of adolescents at the same time until the eighties remains very limited.
1001 questions about ...
“For many years we underestimated the impact of sex education, sexology on our lives. We achieved enviable results. Remember the TV program, when one of the participants of the TV bridge authoritatively said:“ There is no sex in our country! ”? Or maybe it’s time to stop being goodies? Well we must finally recognize that in this area - talking about sexology - are we lagging behind real life? "
This article under the philosophical title "1001 questions about ..." in the newspaper "Worker" for 1988, that is, in the midst of restructuring. Despite the fact that the target audience of these articles are adults, the authors pay special attention to children and adolescents, which will then result in the “Friend” section.
To begin with, the authors outlined the range of problems that the new generation was to deal with. "Remember, only honestly, when did you first want to know how a person of the opposite sex works? Yes, yes, that's right: at four or five years old," they wrote in the newspaper. "But if a kindergarten teacher notes something, she forgetting about his childhood, he will begin to shame the children for all. Here you have the first mistake in sex education. Natural desire, and you can say the kids need to know how a person works, and for that shame, bringing up the wrong perception of the human body, and first, sometimes subconscious, attraction to the opposite sex. "
There are a lot of questions among teenagers. “Why do I want to close in the bathroom and open the circle“ skillful hands ”? Why am I so afraid that parents will find out about this? Only recently, I don’t understand how it happened, talked to my father and found out that he, It was the same. Imagine my father! After talking with him, I stopped wanting to engage in “a circle of skillful hands." What am I, fool, or what? I will fall in love, I will be all right. Isn't it so? And about pollutions now I know everything, but before I was scared, nervous, I thought I was hopelessly sick ... "
"Why do I want to close in the bathroom and open the“ skillful hands circle ”? Why am I so afraid that parents will find out about this?”
The author is unhappy that parents are embarrassed instead of passing information to children - children and adolescents will learn everything from their peers. "Yes, and adults in their company love to“ poison ”, who, when and how ... So it turns out: children - among themselves, adults - among themselves, and as a result ..."
Of course, to say that talking about sex at this time started talking immediately, calmly and completely, incorrectly. For example, the author of "Workers" opens a study on homosexuality by Igor Kon: statistics say that 48% of men surveyed had sex with a man at least once, and 37% had an orgasm. In this regard, it is proposed to educate mothers, grandmothers and wives: "Not only they should be aware of such phenomena, but they should be able to prevent them and be able to be tactful (and this can be taught!) To behave in such situations." Nevertheless, despite the homophobic position, in conclusion, the author calls for the criminal article to be annulled for sodomy: it is supposedly a terrible disease and people should be helped with it, and not put in prison.
There are a lot of comments on this article, including the following: "Adult women and teenagers also read your magazine. I think that the new rubric on sexual relations is harmful! Young people have low morals now, and your articles will corrupt her completely!" They were called on to comment by a researcher at the Department of Psychotherapy of the Central Order of Lenin of the Institute for Advanced Medical Studies, Candidate of Medical Sciences Alexander Vladimirovich Grishin, who dismisses all doubts about the need for sexual education, especially for teenagers. The next two reversal, he explains in detail what the erection, penis, erogenous zones, coitus, friction, ejaculation, and so on. He answers answers to claims simply: there is little literature on this topic, what is, is outdated and incorrect. And in general, the press is not the most popular reading matter among teenagers. So if they already have such an urgent question that they open up the "Worker" for this, then it is time to find out.
"Girlfriend"
A year later, a special column for teenagers called "Girlfriend" appeared in the magazine. At 99%, it is filled with "girlish" advice - but the remaining percentage takes upon itself the responsibility to educate teenagers in matters of sex, however, far less frankly and straightforwardly than before. The first author to talk about sex in the adolescent category was Vaclav Sokolyuk. He graduated from the University of Warsaw with a degree in psychology and pedagogy, worked for many years in a youth development consultation for the family and was one of the authors of the First Sex Textbook for Schools. The book was only partially censored: it was not presented as a textbook so that it would not get access to schools. The Polish author only considers heterosexual contacts admissible, and masturbation and "especially homosexuality" considers less natural forms of sexual activity, which can be avoided if you have sex with your loved one.
In this case, the author encourages girls not to worry about the hymen, myths about which dispels and, by today's standards, radically. "Even if it is considered (girlhood. - Ed.) has a value in a person's life, the absence of it should not affect the assessment of the girl, especially to serve as a reason for her conviction. You should not demand explanations or excuses from the girl. If the young man thinks that girlhood should be preserved before marriage, the same should be demanded from oneself, and in general should clearly present his position on this issue. "Sokolyuk also calls for a responsible approach to first sex, not to engage in it under the pressure of others and under the influence of alcohol .
The author gives advice to girls and young men: first calls to be ready for discomfort with the loss of virginity, the second tells of consent
He demands not to be hypocritical about adolescents and virginity ("All studies show that most people begin to engage in coital activity before marriage, which should be understood as a statement of fact, not an argument") and give adolescents access to contraceptives.
The article provides tips on the first sex from the textbook. The author advises adolescents to choose the right time and not expect that everything will turn out right away: the couple needs time to get to know each other. He gives separate advices to girls and young men: first he calls to be ready for discomfort in case of loss of virginity and to see a doctor if something goes wrong. The second talks about consent (“Try to understand the fears of your girlfriend and do not try to break them by force”), calls to be decisive, but not rude and not distance yourself from your partner after sex: “In how much you will be able to devote yourself to her, and your masculine and maturity. " In case of failure, the author advises teenagers not to blame each other and not to fall into despair, but calmly try to understand its cause and, if necessary, consult with someone more experienced and competent.
Conflicting tips
The articles for adolescents published in The Working Woman at the end of the 80s and in the 90s, thus, contain a rather contradictory set of attitudes. On the one hand, a teenager of the late eighties was supposed to be supplied with contraceptives (they were given on prescription) and information about sexually transmitted diseases. To know that the partner who is outraged by the lack of blood on the sheet is not right; have basic information about sex. On the other hand, adolescents should not have masturbated (an extreme degree of narcissism allegedly develops, and you will only be excited by yourself), and the young men should have sex with partners of their own sex (despite the fact that almost half of the men in the country had such an experience ).
The press did not look for "convenient" words and spoke directly about those whom it considers guilty. For example, in response to a letter from a twenty-three-year-old girl from Tashkent that her husband was furious without seeing blood on the sheet, they published the following: “The despair of a young woman is easy to understand. She suffers. And her husband is to blame for her suffering. that the hymen is different in its strength, and cases when it does not break at the first intimacy are not so rare. The flank stretches gradually, and the final break occurs after a while. It may not come at all. If Husband’s husband is early and many others husbands took care of its sexual education, there would be no such situations. "
It is impossible to use the method of interrupting an act for the purpose of contraception, not because it is unreliable, but because it "negatively affects the psyche of a man"
Nevertheless, while the newspaper talks about contraception, and the editors are outraged by the fact that the “lady in a high post in medicine” refuses to talk about the sex life of adolescents, the advice remains heteronormative and full of sexist stereotypes. For example, in an article about problems in sex designed for more adult women, they are asked "not to go to bed with her husband in hair curlers and a bathrobe." It is impossible to use the method of interrupting an act for the purpose of contraception, not because it is unreliable, but because it "negatively affects the man's psyche, since his attention is focused on preventing the ejaculation by any means."
It can be said that in the USSR people talked about sex with teenagers only twice - in the 1920s and in the 1980s. In the councils, adolescents had a lot of conservative obscurantism, but still tried to focus on health and safety, cited disease statistics, and adolescents tried to provide the missing basic knowledge. Now they talk about sex much more than in the USSR, but the sudden return of "traditional values", it would seem, of the losers in the 90s and zero, greatly hinders serious conversation from modern positions, without heteronormatism and stereotypes.
