How do i live with vitiligo
Vitiligo - one of the most neglected phenomena in medicineThis is a condition in which areas of much lighter natural skin tone appear on different parts of the face and body. There is no melanin on bleached foci, so they barely darken in the sun or can get burned instantly. Most often, stains appear and grow under the influence of stress experienced, but to say why this happens, no one can reliably.
Vitiligo is found in only 0.5-1% of the world's population, does not cause significant inconvenience and poisons the lives of its owners only because it does not correspond to the conventional concept of beauty. Vitiligo can not be infected, it does not cause skin cancer, and there is no confirmed evidence of a connection with heredity. All this is sometimes not obvious to the environment of people with this feature - often they are afraid, avoided or fall asleep with insults. Model and photographer Anastasia Olenich told about her life with vitiligo, about a hostile environment and how to maintain self-confidence in such a situation.
I am twenty-three years old, and three of them I live with vitiligo. I worked as a consultant in a clothing store, and one day the boss shouted at me right in the presence of several visitors. He said that I am a bad employee, that no one wants to work with me - all this is in front of clients who have turned around and just left. This situation brought me into a state of wild stress, and the reaction was a monstrous allergy - red spots all over my body that were itchy, prevented me from sleeping and moving normally.
At first I was treated for allergies. When the itching and redness finally passed, I noticed that now my body was covered with light spots of various sizes. The stains did not cause physical discomfort: they did not hurt, itched and did not peel. Most of them manifested immediately, but later I noticed that under severe stress they can stretch and change. Then I did not know that I had vitiligo, and decided that these were the consequences of allergies. Began to wait when everything goes by itself. Weeks went by and the spots did not disappear.
I thought that a tanning bed could help me: a tan would give the skin a more even shade. But the skin without melanin is defenseless against ultraviolet, so I received a severe burn. It was incredibly painful. What happened pushed me to search through the entire Internet in search of an answer to the question of what was happening to me. Then I made an appointment with a dermatologist. I paid a decent amount of money, passed a lot of surveys. The result was disappointing, I had to hear: "This is vitiligo. It is not treated, put up with it."
The result was disappointing, I had to hear: "This is vitiligo. It is not treated, accept"
My family and friends never allowed themselves to speak out about vitiligo badly. On the contrary, they supported me, sympathized with me and worried about me. My friends helped me a lot by constantly reducing everything to funny jokes and not paying attention to changes in appearance. As for casual people, this is a different story, more complicated. Insults and sidelong glances from strangers were very many. People did not let their children to me on the beach, sat down a couple of times in the subway from me. Once they even asked me to cover my legs, but the most ridiculous incident in my memory occurred when an unknown adult man left such a comment under my photo: "What is beautiful in a corpse with skin peeling off?"
Against the background of such aversion, I started a severe depression. Thoughts were different. I frankly considered myself ugly. She closed in on herself, for two or three months she pulled away from people, went out into the street only when necessary. Due to the enormous pressure from my own self-esteem, I lost faith in myself. I thought it was my fault that I deserved it. Then I did not understand that such an attitude toward myself was a mistake and only aggravated the depression. Cope with the situation helped, as I said, the support of relatives and friends who took me any. And I decided to go to a model school to start fighting with my complexes. There, a recruiter drew attention to me, who offered to take a casting at a model agency. It was impossible to refuse such a chance.
In the first three months of working as a model, my opinion about many things changed dramatically. When I started, at the other end of the world, Chantel Winnie gained immense popularity. Thanks to her and her example, people have become more sympathetic to those with vitiligo. And now, in general, there has come an era in which models with an unusual appearance, differing from the canon by natural data, have become more in demand than commercial types. In general, vitiligo was the last straw that outweighed the balance in the direction of the decision to start a modeling career. Now the agencies are responding to it completely calmly, as everything is in the subject. Much more attention is paid to the growth or hairstyle.
An adult man left a comment under my photo: "What is beautiful in a corpse with scabby skin?"
When I started participating in professional filming and sharing photos with me on the Web, I started receiving messages from people from all over the world. In these messages, people write words of gratitude for the fact that I show myself and do not hesitate. For many I turned out to be a motivator and an example. Once, one of my interlocutors shared an idea: it would be great if there was a project about vitiligo people on the Internet. I fired up with this thought, and it became my dream. This is how my photo project appeared, for which I shoot those who live with vitiligo.
It involves people of different professions and ages. The project does not stand still: I am constantly in search of new characters and stories. To be honest, it is quite difficult to find courageous people who are ready to stand in front of the lens and show themselves as they are. And yet many of those who write to me live in other cities, and I do not have the opportunity to shoot them not in St. Petersburg. Now I sometimes overpower myself and approach people right on the street - but sometimes I get embarrassed, and they immediately get lost and refuse. Those who manage to meet, become my heroes. I know from my own experience how difficult it is to step over myself, so I am extremely grateful to each of the participants. In the future, I would like to make a small photo exhibition dedicated to vitiligo.
As for some special skin care for vitiligo, the spots, in theory, should not be opened in the sun, otherwise a burn may occur. My experience in this matter is very large. Every summer I rest in Bulgaria with my parents - and the sun there, of course, is much more active than in St. Petersburg. Sunscreens do not particularly help, even if they have a high protection factor. And yet I'm not trying to close the spots - my vitiligo responds quite well to the sun, if not abused. Thanks to sunburn, in a very short time, more than half of the spots have darkened and lasted.
Vitiligo is not a contagious disease, not a viral infection and not a deviation from the norm - it is just a cosmetic feature
If vitiligo is still transmitted genetically and my child once has spots, I will explain that this is just such a feature. What Sasha, for example, freckles, Masha birthmark, and he has vitiligo. You can not feel sorry for a person in such a situation - it kills self-esteem and makes him very weak, especially in childhood.
In my opinion, with all the abundance of information on the Web, there is not enough such that would form in people without this feature a clear idea that vitiligo is not a contagious disease, not a viral infection and not a deviation from the norm - this is just a cosmetic feature. It is not necessary to get rid of it, it does not threaten anything and, most importantly, there can be no reason for ridicule and insult.
Only three years after the appearance of the spots, I was able to accept vitiligo as part of myself. And I would not want to change anything. I am glad and grateful that it happened to me. During these three years, I understood several important things: only close and dear people can show true sympathy and understanding. You can not engage in self-blame, blame yourself for what happened. And still it is worth trying to leave the comfort zone, show yourself and your spots to others - gradually, so that it does not bring significant psychological discomfort. The most important thing to remember: vitiligo is not a disease, but a feature.
Photo: Efim Shevchenko, Svetlana Boynovich
