Noodles on the ears: Men about their specialties
In our view every man has at least one dish that he can perfectly cook if necessary. We asked friends to tell them that they would cook a girl for dinner or breakfast in order to feed and impress her.
Sergey Blokhin journalist and copywriter
For a man advocating gender equality, the cook of me is shameful. Instead of culinary delights, I have long concentrated on a purely functional HLS kitchen, compensating bad habits. This can impress a girl, but you cannot satisfy her. There were, of course, breakthroughs like pumpkin soup, vegetables in a wok in Chinese, or a salad with roasted tomatoes, but the greatest success was brought to me, imagine dumplings. Write the recipe: take one Frenchwoman who first came to Moscow and sit in the kitchen. With a businesslike facial expression, showing that it’s not at all difficult for you to hold a conversation while diving into the sacraments of Russian gastronomy, you focus on the mysterious little things (bay leaf, allspice peas, finely chopped dill when serving, and so on) and slightly distract from the essence ( purchased pack of dumplings from the freezer). You take out a bottle of vodka and explain cultural differences: do not drink alcohol with food, as in France, but slam 50 grams before a unit of a Siberian dish. Voila - authentic dinner from local ingredients. Bienvenue en Russie!
Igor KompanietsSenior Editor, PORT magazine Russia
To begin with, according to the astrological tradition, I was born under the sign of Cancer. And "raki", according to transcendental experts, cannot imagine life without soups. These people have learned the truth, soups - the most important component of my diet. Which ones? Everything! But what exactly do I know how to famously cook: soup, refreshing cucumber or meat hodgepodge? No no and one more time no. Tom Yam and Green Curry! Sometimes I prepare them, not even highlighting them in separate disciplines, but as an intermediate something - it turns out strange, but deeply emotional. I fell in love with these soups during my first trip to Samui, it was about ten years ago: I ate a spoon, I shed a tear. Gash. Ate the second, coughed. Gone. This is dope. Which I decided to do myself. I, a pot of boiling water, a ladle and components of the future dish, no one else at this moment should be around. You know, earlier in Moscow for cooking successful, as my friend RG Burtsev puts it, “taychatiny” needed to carry with them from Indochina banks of pastes, bags of mixes and dry edible garbage, complementing them with orders on tropical.ru and finishing it with fresh trifles such as baby kurruzy in the network of premium, as they say, Azbuka Vkusa supermarkets. Now everything is simpler, I can find each of the necessary ingredients within half an hour after leaving the apartment. Everything has become more accessible, but the effect of a lively exotic brew is still bearing fruit: a charming companion swims, I swim, we sneeze and swell together due to the amount of acute - and the difficulties, as we know, bring them together. Well, the next morning at the stove, you can copy the best side dish of "Coffeemania" - spinach with cream. Fortunately, it takes about fifty seconds. After this, you can proceed to the most interesting, namely, to a bottle of good after-dinner champagne.
Dmitry Ustinovmusician, fashionable disc jockey
Interesting fact: over the years, my ability to cook is experiencing the effect of Benjamin Button, that is, shrinking to a tiny size and starting to drool. In my student days, I knew how to make spreading salads and even the second, then the process was optimized and I started adding the second to the salad. Called "warm salad of all that is in the refrigerator." Is it possible to impress such a girl? Well, of course. Not a single pair of female eyes, seeing such a salad, did not remain in their orbits. In these eyes, a mixture of admiration, pity and a burning desire to save a lost soul, so desired by every male heart, was read. To avoid misunderstandings, I’ll say that they still ate it and found it piquant. Over the years I grew up mentally and stopped eating meat, but I did not learn to cook something else and switched to compound feed. From now on, I can treat a lady of the heart to about three hundred varieties of cheese sandwiches - I confidently experiment with varieties and texture of toasts and sometimes find incredibly extravagant combinations. It also evokes some mixture of admiration, pity and desire to save a lost soul ... For example, goat cheese looks defiantly and even defiantly on toast of black bread with dried fruit and a thin layer of orange jam. And in the morning, a toast made of grain bread with a paste of avocado, olive oil and lemon juice, on which mini scrambled eggs from one egg are slightly casually thrown, is not bad. However, my main culinary feat, which has never let me down, is the willingness to always drive to the store.
Pasha Artemyevmusician, actor
In general, I really like to cook. When I was studying in Milan, one musician taught me the recipe for pasta with tuna - he worked in an orchestra and worked as a waiter at various restaurants, and now he has his own restaurant. So, pasta needs tomatoes, garlic, oregano, tuna, a little thick cream; It is best to use penne and cook them until al dente. Everything is cooked easily and quickly, so for entertainment you can learn how to skillfully chop garlic like a real cook. The main thing is to do everything as confidently as possible - the very kind of busy man in the kitchen makes a hypnotic impression on some girls. Well, wine, of course, helps.
Dmitry Telnovtraveler
When it comes to a dinner prepared by a man, it is always a test. Any woman wants to know how her current satellite (in the case of a favorable development of the situation, of course) fit in the household. To be honest, I was always a little offended to be the only object of research in such bridegrooms, and I decided that I would also examine my companion under a microscope. Much, of course, learn not work, but to find out how much the lady is fastidious in food, you can easily. On the spirit can not stand the whims. Therefore, for the first dinner together, I always cook lamb loin. I got this recipe at Le Cordon Bleu culinary school. To do, in general, do not need anything, the main thing is to buy high-quality meat. It remains only to fold the lamb ribs on the same principle as the fingers "in the lock", put in the oven and open a bottle of wine. And the resulting dish because of its shape looks so original that any girl will be ready to forgive you even the notorious inability to hammer a nail into the wall.
Vasily ShevchenkoCo-owner of the comic book "Chuk and Geek"
To hit her dinner, I will most likely choose a fettuccine with tuna, especially if time is short and you need to make an impression. It is made simply, even for vegetarians, all the ingredients are usually at my fingertips (and you can trump up your own olive oil from Italy). There is nothing difficult: fry the crushed garlic in olive oil, remove, slightly extinguish the sliced tomatoes (one can of sliced tomatoes, 300 ml) to remove excess liquid from there, add tuna, sliced olives, capers and a little lemon zest. All this should be then ten minutes, season with parsley and mix with cooked pasta. It’s almost impossible to spoil this recipe, but it doesn’t make an impression "on heaps", and in the course of cooking you can always discuss Italy. And if a girl doesn’t like pasta, then what about a fig me?
Igor Rubinsteincopywriter
My, alas, not rich, experience of conquering women says that the food here, most likely, has nothing to do with it. There were victories on an empty stomach, and failures after supper in five aphrodisiac dishes with dessert and lies. I do not flirt, I really do not understand how it all works: at first, it is not clear what, and then sex, yes? But feeding is at least a success: if a girl decides to wait for breakfast, she rolls even the simplest option. In Levante it is shakshuka (fried eggs with fried tomatoes), a couple of salads and coffee.
A true shakshuku taught me to cook a fellow, an Israeli of Algerian origin, but in my version of the recipe, chili, curry, shug, harissa and other cruel ingredients disappeared. In a large frying pan, heat the olive oil, fry onions, add diced sweet peppers and garlic cloves, which have been gently crumpled with a knife, and put round slices of tomatoes on top - it is desirable that their layer completely covers the vegetables. Pepper, add sweet dried paprika and oregano. Densely pour ketchup - just ketchup, not tomato paste (ideal "Heinz"). Do not mix - until all this heats up, the tomatoes are made soft, and the dish turns into a side dish for eggs: carefully break up, keeping the yolks, salt and throw a few sprigs of thyme and a pinch of crushed nutmeg on top. 5-7 minutes in a pan with the lid tightly closed - until the yolks are fully prepared - and the main (and simplest) part is finished.
In the salads stage, it would be appropriate to apologize to my girlfriend, because to cook them you had to set fire an hour and a half ago, put a large eggplant and three colorful peppers on the grill, and, while it was all fried, cook tehna , juice of one lemon, salt, garlic, chopped parsley). Then remove the grilled eggplant baked to charred skin and throw on a plate. Use a sharp knife to cut lengthwise, scoop up all the pulp with a tablespoon, fold it into a bowl, add ground pepper, lemon juice, more garlic, a little paprika and a couple of large spoons of freshly prepared meat. With peppers will have to tinker a little more: they need to be removed from the fire slightly charred. Peel is removed simply if each pepper is placed in a small plastic bag. Peeled peppers are cut into strips, sprinkled with olive oil, then balsamic vinegar, and of course, salt, garlic, lemon, and pepper are clear.
Ilya Klishin chief editor of the site TVRain.ru
I must say: the idea of cooking soup for a romantic dinner, especially after a couple of dates, seems to me obviously a failure. And it doesn't matter at all whether it is pumpkin cream soup or a New Orleans chowder, it will be awkward anyway. Another thing, if your relationship came to a stop, "her first illness." She is all in snot and with temperature lying under a blanket and says that she is ugly. And waiting, of course, how will you take care of her. As American culture teaches us through TV shows, it is at this point that it would be nice to bring her some soup (“bring her some soup”). The best option is chicken noodle soup. Cooking is very easy. For broth, throw a chicken or several pieces into a large saucepan, boil for an hour, then add a couple of chopped onions and shabby carrots, salt, pepper, bay leaf and seasoning as desired (then remove the chicken, cut it and put it back). Potatoes are optional. Noodles and greens should be added at the end, of course, you can knead it (google it), or you can just buy it in the store.
Yura Chernykh chief editor of CarambaTV
I have two post-apocalyptic recipes that can conquer any girl who survived the disaster. The first born while trying to cook pasta "Bolognese". I then shredded minced meat with onions, sketched red and yellow vegetables there, added tomato paste, garlic and basil. Later it turned out that this culinary performance was called "Sloppy Joe" and not even spaghetti. This is such a sauce, a brutal analogue of "Bolognese", you can eat it just with bread. The monstrous nightmare of any stomach - to madness simple and nourishing to frenzy. The state of the kitchen after cooking is estimated by the orange level of danger. But the coolest experience of cooking I consider the so-called apple soup. In theory, this is a classic charlotte, which turned out in practice to be anything but a pie. Imagine a picture - two cretins try to crush the dough with butter in a deep bowl with a mixer: “Maybe it's even stronger?” - "What is stronger? Oh, oh, chew, chew !!" - "See what happens!" - "On the wall, on the wall of his spread." - "So, you hold it at an angle, and I will turn the bowl ..." "Next, the" foundation "is laid out in this form, filled with apple-sugar mixture and, since we did not understand the oven, put it on the stove and begin to puff. A girl comes into the kitchen at this moment: "Oh, what do you have it smells like boiled here? What is it, apple soup? Guys, it is boiled, really! It boils!" There is no possibility, but the adventures for the whole evening. The state of the kitchen after cooking is estimated by the red level of danger. In general, if a nuclear disaster happens - I know what to do.
Anton Utkinfilm director
The first dish, which is easiest to capture the imagination and peyzan, and beautiful ladies, has already been discussed on the pages of Wonderzine. Saumon mi-cuit à l'évier is quite a high kitchen, and I usually cook it with a thermal circulator and a vacuum sealer, but it turned out that a little bit ago I ended up in the French Alps and made salmon in the sink for all the fun : bag, butter, seasonings, + 45ºC, 25 minutes inside and 15 seconds on the grill. The local French authority was extremely impressed, in response, he uncorked a bottle of very decent Prime Minister - in general, that evening was a great success, and is it necessary to say that the impressionable women have both the dish and the process itself (sink! Packages! Hot water from tap!) cause a whole gamut of emotions somewhere between delight and awe. The second option is the traditional Japanese hot pot ("nabe"), which over the years of experiments, I have brought it almost to the point of absurdity. Shrimps, lightly fried with sitimi togarasi (pepper mix), udon noodles, dashi broth, onsen tamago (in Moscow they offer Mariukame; they need a thermal circulator again), nori and wakame seaweed, braised with garlic and rosemary, shiitake mushrooms, fresh onions Spoon, pickled and crumpled with adzinomoto and shoy cucumbers, as well as aburaage, edamame and onion rings caramelized in the world. It sounds like something that takes about half a life, but the years of dexterity don't go in vain, so if I have ingredients I collect this recipe in 25-30 minutes - somewhere between the first cup of coffee, washing and charging, - and the morning bowl of this hot soup allows you to do without food before dusk.
Mikhail Degtyarev co-owner of Renegadestore.ru
I decided to somehow find an alternative to my favorite breakfast - scrambled eggs with bacon and tomatoes, and cheese, and sometimes even potatoes (all the most delicious at once). But I do not eat everything, the thought of having breakfast without eggs suggested melancholy and sadness, and poached eggs were still not given, so the search turned out to be difficult. At that time, I only became friends with the Worcestershire sauce, except perhaps adding it to tea, and somehow I came across a recipe for Welsh toast just with this sauce. My favorite ingredients — cheddar cheese, Dijon mustard, Worcestershire sauce, scallions, and simply toasted bread — brought him closer to the idea of my fried eggs. In general, I decided to try it: I mixed all the above ingredients, added some milk, laid it out on a toasted baguette, and baked a little. Despite the fact that the lady’s breakfast had already taken place long ago, a strange smell made her curious and even steal one toast. The next time she was cooking, but she refused to fry bread in butter.
Photo: cover photo via Shutterstock