“Will the orgasm disappear?”: How I decided to remove the uterus
Reproductive system diseases - a complex topic in the Russian-speaking space. In a patriarchal society, motherhood is considered motherhood by default, and the desire to get rid of excruciating pain, if it affects the ability to have children, is perceived as selfishness. The feelings and desires of a woman, her health and the ability to think critically, depreciate at the same time - although decisions like the removal of the uterus are usually not made spontaneously and certainly do not come easily. Marina K. told how it is to live with uterine myoma and permanently get rid of it after numerous operations.
From the age of seventeen I began to take contraceptive pills and I felt great: menstruation as if by the hour, no ailments. When I was twenty-one, once the bleeding had somehow dragged out, it became more abundant, and I went to the doctor. The doctor decided that the drug over the years, apparently, has ceased to suit me, and more modern means have already appeared, and changed the pills for others. Almost immediately after that, we moved to another city, the connection with the doctor was interrupted. Once I was taking a shower and was horrified - some huge bloody piece fell out of me. The next day, I had an ultrasound scan and found a uterine myoma the size of an eight-week fetus.
At first, the doctors decided to just observe - and the fibroid continued to grow. Bleeding did not stop, it prevented me from living, I continued to go to the doctors. I was prescribed an operation, but since there was no immediate threat to life, it was due almost eight months later (this is how government medicine works in Israel, where I have lived since childhood). In addition, when the date was already approaching, the operation was again postponed for some reason, such as a strike by doctors.
I was exhausted by pain, bleeding and preparation for the operation, I was given absolutely terrible shots. There is a drug that, in fact, introduces the body into an artificial menopause; it is also used for recidivist rapists to destroy sexual desire. You can imagine how terrible this medicine is. It is believed that you can make a maximum of three such injections, and I made them. Imagine: I am twenty two years old, no children, my husband and I (then the future) just rented a separate apartment - it would seem, have sex from morning to evening. Instead, my husband bought me a few packs of pads every day.
In the end, I waited for the operation, my fibroid was removed - it was August, and in September the bleeding began. It was even stronger than before. The doctor did not believe his eyes: in the past month myoma has grown to its former size. It all started anew: preparation, three more shots (I remind you, it is believed that there can be no more than three in life, but I have done six), a new operation. When I came to my senses after anesthesia, it turned out that the tumor could not be removed: severe bleeding opened during the operation. Often, in such a situation, the uterus is removed, but the doctor understood that then I definitely could not have children, and decided to save her.
I felt terrible, very thin, because of the constant loss of blood hemoglobin was two times lower than normal. At the same time I studied at the institute, tried to earn money, live a normal life, we planned a wedding. I was already assigned a third operation, and then something amazing happened. As I remember, I just went to the wedding dress shop, and then got on the bus and felt that some unreal flow was pouring out of me. Trying to restrain him, I rushed to my husband at work and flew into his office with a cry: "Give me some package." A huge pool of blood spilled onto the bag on the floor, and we rushed to the hospital.
I was examined, and it turned out that the fibroid, which was kept on some “tail”, suddenly fell by itself - in fact, was “born”. After that, she stopped growing, and for several years this story was completely forgotten. We got married, thought about the pregnancy, came to the doctor. The doctor explained that I was completely healthy, and told me to come if I couldn’t become pregnant within a year - but the pregnancy came in a couple of weeks.
I gave birth, then I became pregnant again and gave birth, and now our children are 15 and 12 years old. In general, we dreamed of four or at least three children, but after the birth of the youngest daughter, my career took off, and I decided to postpone the next pregnancy for now. When she was two years old, we left for Russia for a while, I had an excellent contract, and the family went on the basis of my visa. Then the husband offered to have a child, since good conditions and insurance will pay for everything, but I decided that it would be unfair to my company. If the contract was his, and I would give birth - is another matter. Well, or if he could get pregnant and give birth! In general, we decided that we would think about the third child when we return to Israel.
All this time I used reliable contraception: at first it was a regular spiral, and then hormonal. But at some point there appeared bleeding and it turned out that the fibroid was back. I had a third operation, and she grew up again, at the same speed. Again bleeding, terrible pains in different places that the tumor was pressing on. We continued to think about the third child, but I was scared. From what I read about myoma, it turned out that either the pregnancy is interrupted or the birth is finished; at that time I was thirty-nine years old. I came to the doctor again, and he said that once I didn’t decide on the next child, it’s time to stop the torment - and a decision was made about hysterectomy (removal of the uterus).
I know that some women face misunderstanding on the part of relatives or a husband, they are afraid to tell their partners about such operations. My pedicure says her husband left her because of a similar problem. Everything is different in my family: we have been together for twenty-five years and during this time I have never gone to a gynecologist without a husband, he always knew about my diagnoses and everything. Of course, he was present at the birth and at the operations. And we also go to his doctors together. Even when there were no children, I said that maybe it would be better for him to find a healthy woman who would exactly give birth - but he replied that he loved me, and if we want a child and we don’t succeed, then adopt it.
I underwent surgery to remove the uterus easily, I was then completely insanely loaded with work that did not leave my thoughts. I remember that I was dealing with the problem of a group of people who had flown in - they had lost their luggage. I was in touch all day and evening, and at six in the morning, when we arrived at the operation, I also sat in the hospital and talked on the phone. And now my name is for an operation, and on my machine I say to my husband: “Go for me, I have an important conversation.” And then, when she came to her senses after anesthesia, she first asked for a phone to continue doing things.
I did not immediately understand that my torment was over. In the first week and a half, I was worried about only one question at all - whether the orgasm would disappear. I remember, barely waited for the removal of stitches to masturbate and make sure that everything is in order, the orgasm has not gone anywhere. Of course, for some time it was painful, it is still abdominal surgery, there was a scar on the abdomen, but this doesn’t compare with how much better life has become. Three years have passed, I feel great, ride a bike, run, go to the gym. Sex - at least every day. Monthly no, so do not plan anything and look at the calendar before traveling. I got a little better, but maybe that would have happened. And sometimes I dream that a third child was born.
Photo: Jon Olmstead - stock.adobe.com, Jon Olmstead - stock.adobe.com