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Slatstejming: Why women are convicted of sexuality

TEXT:Daria Suharchuk

"2016 YEAR. IT'S TIME TO ALREADY BIND WITH LODGEHAMING AND SLATCHAMING. I'm not going to depend on those who have any problems with my sexuality. Stay yourself and let me be yourself too, Kim Kardashian writes in his essay. - I'm a mother. I am a wife, sister, daughter, entrepreneur, and I have the right to be sexual. "Kim Kardashian is one of the most objectified women on the planet, a meta-woman and a pop diva who knows exactly where she is going on his heels and what he thinks about it. But the world sees in it basically body parts: well, yes, she has them, and yes, she is proud of them.

Women who do not hide their sexuality, cause polar reactions - where there is only one step from an enthusiastic discussion to conviction. Amber Rose defends Kim Kardashian and her nude selfies, urges not to be ashamed of one-night connections and actively criticizes double standards relating to male and female sexuality. “It’s a pity that I didn’t understand before that the reaction of those around me to my sexuality is not my problem, but theirs,” says Emily Ratakovsky, who became famous after the Blurred Lines video by Robin Tika.

The very notion of a slatsyming (condemnation of a woman for a “frivolous” appearance or behavior equivalent to the cry of “whore!”) Has no analogue in Russian, as well as a well-established translation. And this is the case when there is no word, but there is a phenomenon. Suffice it to recall how quite recently social networks traversed the looks and manners of Larisa Sladkova, who is leading the weather forecast at the Chelyabinsk branch of the CTC channel. It is no secret that the position of leading weather transmissions around the world is often taken by spectacular women who are able to rivet attention to the screen — it is still believed that sex can sell anything, including the Atlantic anticyclone. On the Italian channel Rete 4, a similar approach to the choice of presenters turned into a major sex scandal, and the new head of the news service began changing the channel by making the weather forecast by professional meteorologists.

The Mexican channel Televisa Monterrey is generally famous for its multi-sex leading weather forecast. Girls quickly became known by the nickname "pupa" and began to appear in other shows; in one of them the chest and waist of the heroine are measured with a centimeter. Mexican presenters believe that looking sexy is their duty, because this is what the channel management and the audience demands from them. “It’s important to have a beautiful body,” says presenter Gabriela Lozoya. “I put myself in the viewer's place: if I see someone ugly on the screen, I’ll switch the channel.” And this is a very important point that we often forget about: it is the system and society that dictates such standards of appearance, and this same system and society consider themselves entitled to condemn them.

The traditional idea of ​​sex, where a man takes, and a woman gives, turns a sexy woman into an object

On the one hand, we are told that sexuality is a necessary, if not the main feature of a woman, on the other hand, “excessive” sexuality regularly causes a parade of stinging jokes and is consistently associated with lightheadedness, vulgarity and stupidity. And society takes over the right to draw the line between "good" and "bad" sexuality. It is worth remembering the post of Sergey Parkhomenko about the leading Echo of Moscow Erika Ever, where a famous and experienced journalist, having published a photo of the sexually-looking presenter, concluded that she was unprofessional in appearance.

Such a reaction resembles the famous footage from the film "Malena," which perfectly explains the mechanism of objectification and attacks on sexy women. The main character, shown by the eyes of a teenager in love with her, practically does not speak throughout the entire film and acts very little. The main, defining feature of Malena is her sexuality, which gives rise to unconfirmed rumors about her many connections with men and ultimately destroys her life. She is silent, not because she has nothing to say - just those around her do not have anything to do with her words. Malena for them is not a man, but the center of their sexual fantasies. Object without a voice. Why do you need a voice, a girl, with such a booty and such legs?

Stereotypes that have existed for centuries tell us that female sexuality can be expressed only through male desire, male views, which means that a frankly sexy woman is the embodied desire of the men who surround her. In a patriarchal society, female sexuality is under the control of men: it is they who decide whether women’s appearance and actions are considered depraved and unacceptable or, conversely, arouse desire and, consequently, approval. That is why so often the victims of slatstimming are women who take their sexuality into their own hands and independently dispose of their body: those who freely change partners and those who refuse to have sex with a man face accusations.

The traditional idea of ​​sex, where a man takes, and a woman gives, turns a sexy woman into a default object. The more vividly this sexuality is expressed, the more difficult it is for us to disengage from it and see a person with a biography, belief system and feelings behind the sexual body (as well as the neckline, mini-skirt or nude photo). It is more difficult to sympathize with stressed women who are condemned by society because they do not correspond to our ideas about how the victims should look and behave. It is much easier to decide that the amount of male attention that comes to them compensates for all the attacks and makes them deserved.

On the other hand, it is believed that attracting too much attention is indecent: women are supposed to hide, control their sexuality and cherish it for “that one”. Exposed for everyone to see, sexuality seems to depreciate, and with it the personality of a woman also depreciates - and this is most noticeable in a society where the value of a woman for society is determined primarily by her attractiveness. Frankly a sexy woman in the minds of others partly ceases to be a man. She is an embodied desire of the beholder, an object that can be freely discussed. Harassment is perceived by many as a fair punishment for "excessive" sexuality.

The right to their point of view, the right to a complex inner life in many ways makes a person a man in the eyes of other people. Every time when a woman appears in front of us, looking sexually emphasized, it is much easier to blame her for lack of taste, immorality or stupidity, or, finally, that she did not find the strength to fight for the right to look different. After all, expressed sexuality can be both conscious and voluntary, and imposed by society, and find out what comes first, sometimes very difficult. Therefore, it is first of all important to recognize the share of one’s own guilt in what is happening and to understand that the cause of slashing is not in the actions and appearance of other people, whatever their motives, but in our attitude to them. And a good training for this is to learn to see under a person’s sexual outfit, and not just separate parts of the body.

PHOTO: cover photo Miramax Films

Watch the video: Male Rape: Breaking the Silence. My Story (March 2024).

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