Link of the day: "I no longer communicate with my mother"
ONLINE "LINK OF THE DAY" We recommend materials from other publications on topics that deserve attention. Today Passion.ru material came under the gun - the story of a woman who had endured physical and psychological violence from her mother for many years.
The topic of domestic violence in Russia is extremely taboo, and it is sometimes difficult for people who come across it to be identified (really, how to sort out a situation if it doesn’t happen to everyone around?), Find the strength to get out of such a relationship subsequently talk about his experience. Everything becomes doubly more difficult when it comes to parental violence: we have been taught that the younger ones are obliged to forgive their elders and take care of them, no matter what. Unfortunately, this approach only feeds the guilt feelings of the victim of violence, forces them to tolerate and resign, and deprives of the right to hurt and their own borders.
"The childhood that most of us have is a happy time, I remember with horror and never would never want to go back there. I was a good girl and quiet. Neither friends, nor circles, God forbid school discos. You can’t. Questions “Why” they didn’t ask in our family, because my mother beat her - her face, stomach, pulled out her hair. She rummaged in my briefcase, in my desk - and once found a note addressed to a boy. There was a scandal, I didn’t go to school for a week - I waited for the bruises to heal. "
"The real story: I no longer communicate with my mother", Passion.ru
Passion.ru published a monologue of the heroine, who confessed anonymously that she had been subjected to physical and psychological violence from her mother for many years. Now an adult woman tells her story: the mother controlled her daughter’s life and humiliated her from an early age and even when the heroine had her own children. She needed to make enormous emotional efforts to get out of this control and begin to independently manage her own life. The story seems very scary, and the first reaction of many readers is to try to find an acceptable explanation for what is happening, for example, suspecting the mother of mental disorder. After all, it is much harder to see and realize that domestic violence is a systemic problem, which is possible even in “normal families”, hidden by many years of silence and doubly frightening in its ubiquity.