“Woman, know your place!”: Men about Alexey Belyakov’s columns
AT THE BEGINNING OF THIS WEEK A NEW COLUMN IS POSTED ON THE SNOD SITE Allure Chief Editor Alexei Belyakov with the title "Woman, Know Your Place!" - One of many in which Alexey dictates to women how they should behave, dress and look, in order to please men. We collected a number of talking quotes from other columns of Belyakov, which have long caused the indignation of women, and learned from the men themselves what they think of such a "masculine look."
About "strong women":
When a woman allows herself to play a male, there is a violation of the ancient terrible laws. Here our men open Slavic abysses. No matter how many times we pretend to be civilized people, everyone can break, even if he is not in the workout, but in the muffler and the candidate of art history. Because the role of a woman is to agree, nod, smile. Cute whims - please. But in the framework of the unshakable social model. Ring, shoes, ticket to the concert Meladze. Only, comrades feminists, do not blame me for justifying the violence. Not. Never. Women themselves justify it. "Ah, he's so hot-tempered!"
"Woman, know your place!", Snob
It’s time to stop this orgy until nature punishes us. No, let there be strong women, well, two or three in a million, and that's enough. They have such an organism, and for God's sake. The rest should cry, be capricious, demand foot massage - not in the cabin, at home! - and their Dima should rush to them. Who decides everything, settles, arranges. With which is calm, reliable, forever. Because that's the only way. Because this harmony is built from above, and to destroy it is more terrible than to blur the ozone layer. It's as simple as one plus one equals eternity.
"Why am I against strong women", Allure
People often say about such things - they say, this is a clickback, why do you even pay attention to this and add views. In my opinion, this is a rather flawed logic - click on the click and click to that which aims at the widest audience; if you do not notice it, the broadcast of relevant views on this audience will not be burdened. At the same time, I would not overestimate the value of outraged views - the measure of reputational damage for both the author and the publication is clearly higher.
Another argument in defense of such statements is, they say, why do you practice censorship, a person has the right to an opinion and the like. Here I would like to remind that censorship, even by dictionary definition, implies the participation of the state and some administrative supervisory apparatus. Even if we understand the term as a metaphor and keep in mind the censorship of collective Facebook, then, in my opinion, it’s still far from unanimity. Simply put, it is not called censorship, but a discussion - in which, if appropriate, it is necessary and explained to the opponent that he is engaged in the dissemination of shameful, unfaithful and simply harmful stereotypes. And not only harmful for women and understanding of the role they can play in society, but also for men.
For me, for example, not only is this whole submissive-derogatory discourse addressed to women offensive, but also stereotyping of men as strong males, whose life strategies, according to the author, are incomprehensible balance between tireless sexual objectification and the desire to protect, resolve issues and the same earn the most objectification. Yes, he went to hell. I am a man, and I also often do not want to decide anything - and I have the right to do so. The flip side of this postcard sexism is that its propagandist reduces himself to a bag with testosterone, in which money elsewhere appears. In my opinion, this is an extremely unattractive picture.
About female appearance:
An aunt of almost retirement age, which is exposed, this aunt is ridiculous, if not comical. Everything, you know, its time. When Helen Mirren plays a dashing grandmother with a barrel at the ready in the movie "RED" - it's cool, fun, eager. This movie. But she does not bare, as did forty years ago in the film "Caligula". And there was something to see, young Helen - sex bomb.
"Male look: Monica, get dressed urgently!", Allure
But let's see the truth below the belt: are all girl's legs so good? Do miniskirts and shorts always adorn a girl? I declare with full responsibility: not always. Legs are too fat, frighteningly thin, finally, just ugly. And when a girl with flabby and pale legs puts on very short shorts, I cannot welcome this with all of my liberalism. And on my side, half the planet, including, by the way, and gays, who are particularly picky about appearance.
"masculine look: girls and miniskirts", Allure
Vladimir Sorokin has the story "Nastya". This is such a stylization under Chekhov, an illustration of the celebration of the 16th anniversary of the main character. Parents and guests bring gifts to the girl and make compliments in every possible way preparing for the “most important day in her life”, and then roast them in the oven and eat them to talk about philosophy. The text is shocking, including the fact with which ordinariness and pathos refers to literally cannibalistic morality. For me, the texts of Alexei Belyakov are not much different from the content of "Nastya." They completely depersonalize, objectify women, deprive them of their rights to their body, to their own desires in both the sexual and mental spheres, prescribe rituals aimed at satisfying the "older" men in the hierarchy, and describe the humiliations that women should go to, in the end to be adequately eaten. Therefore, my attitude to his columns is approximately the same as that Sorokin's narrative: disgust combined with bewilderment.
This is not a news story for me: there are a lot of chauvinists in Russia - for example, it shows how triumphant sexist, racist and homophobic Donald Trump in our country are in triumph. And if the latter appeals to the audience of “angry white men,” to whom the chief editor of the magazine for women turns to - it is not clear. Imagine that you come to the doctor with a toothache, and he prescribes you an antiviral drug and "Our Father" before going to bed - the essence will be approximately the same, only the reaction will be stronger. The most annoying thing is that it is so easy to meet cannibals among successful people. Absolutely wild sexist views are characteristic both for the chief editor of a fashion magazine, for the columnist Snob, for the ssememschik of the liberal news portal, and even for the popularizer of science.
About bodypositive:
And in the Pirelli calendar, I want to see young, strong, naked girls. Not the feet of the 80-year-old Yoko Ono. And not abundant folds on the abdomen of Amy Schumer, comedienne actress.
Yes, I am a savage sexist. And behind my back there are still millions of the same cruel sexists, including truckers on heavy wagons. We are with truckers for a pure genre. Evolution has not created anything better than a beautiful female body. Bodypositivists should let the hamburger hamster out for the night, if you want, we don’t want to undress them And if the truckers begin their march to New York with the demand to make a normal calendar, I will join on my bike.
"Man's look:" Pirelli are stunned! ", Allure
Body positivity is a terribly harmful thing. Opium for the people. The fact is that a person as a being burdened with consciousness is important to have a goal. Supertask. In a masculine form, this is status. In a profession or society. A woman has the most important task of her whole life - to be attractive. Alluring Well, that's the way it is - God or Darwin, who wants to count how. A woman can make a career and seek status, but this is not a super task, it is just ambition. Moreover, high status and the money accompanying it serve the most important task. When you have a million or so procedures, this is not bad.
"Male look at #bodypositive", allure
By and large, the columns of Belyakov exist just because it is already more or less clear to everyone that what is written in them is horror and gloom. That is, it is clear that in modern society this is considered horror and darkness, but at the same time this modern society itself is not clear. Belyakov is terribly archaic, under the guise of the rules of etiquette, he regularly postulates things that were recently the norm to talk about (for example, whether it’s possible to eat on dates, the heroine of “Sex and the City” only 15 years ago) . It is not good, when the world that you understand goes out and some new, incomprehensible comes, here are the texts of Belyakov - this is a note of protest to the new world. And he is not alone, he himself writes: "Yes, I am a cruel sexist. And there are millions more of the same cruel sexists behind my back." These millions have already understood what sexism is, but for the time being they sincerely do not understand what is so bad about it.
Outrage, of course, is an understandable first reaction to such a way of thinking, but a look down only aggravates the situation (as we see in the example of Trump’s election as president of the United States). Therefore, it is just to betray Belyakov of the obstruction and, for example, to demand his dismissal is only to provoke the real addressees of his messages (and these are not women at all, of course). To demand empathy from people is generally a bad idea, empathy does not work that way. We have to argue again, to explain. And then again. Sexism, after all, has been with us for too long and has been built into society too tightly, not to get rid of it quickly.
About female sexuality:
We, men, are afraid of this terrible operation more than women. That is, not the operation itself, but the consequences. How to accept what we see? The fact that this place - which we loved very much, caressed! Is there an ugly scar at this place? Of course, we need restraint, let's be honest. And few people are able to cope with them. Yes, we are ready to regret. And not for long. And love? To love the one who was the closest person, and suddenly she was disfigured?
"Woman after cancer and divorce," allure
We live to stare at girlish charms. All these offices and mortgages are nonsense, invented to distract us from the main thing. From April to October we are happy and divided, there is a sense of life. We want everyone that runs past in a short skirt and tight-fitting T-shirt. Blood boils, head spinning, the Earth rotates.
And in the winter? Girls! Do not change your biological essence. Tease, seduce, corrupt.
"Winter! It's time to be sexy," Allure
There is abundantly - a man's prerogative, girls need only three leaves and a piece of cheese. At least - we should see such a picture. It is touching, it is charming and, finally, - and we always mentally strip you with your eyes - promises us to see later in the gloom a quivering figure, and not a tired "goddess of fertility."
"MEN'S LOOK: WHAT SHOULD HAVE A GIRL IN NEW YEAR'S NIGHT", ALLURE
In general, these statements about the place of a woman in society are purely divan sexism, even if the sofa of Alexei is in the editorial office of a glossy publication. It is somehow absurd to write such things in 2016. The poles are absolutely changed - the majority of the US population chooses Hillary Clinton as president, Nathalie Bois de la Tour heads the French Football League, and a certain Alexei writes, no, woman, you should be weak and thin, please my eye and do everything for my approval. Even more surprising is how Alexey tries to substantiate his position: by the fact that he, you see, is a Russian peasant and a real Slav, and sexism is in his blood. Only, to be honest, with the image of the Russian peasant, whining about the dog barking at him does not fit in at all. But with the image of a troll in the body of an adult man - completely.
But it’s really sad that Alexei is still reading and believing in all this nonsense that legs should be slim, butts should be firm, and everything else is ugly and not the norm. Even here under this post on "Snob" a lot of approving comments from women. It turns out that the Russian gloss and Belyakov in particular, at one time, educated the reader with a philosophy based on the standards of the advertising industry, and she is still being fed to it. And he eats and happy. What to do with this vicious circle - I do not know.
About communicating with women:
No, it is much better if there are different political views with a friend. He is, say, a liberal, and she is a violent Stalinist. First of all, life will be more fun. Both. Secondly, it exacerbates the drama of nightly delights. "Well, Ira, do you like Stalin? Do you like?" But she can not answer: the mouth is busy.
"Particularly dangerous: 5 types of girls that men avoid," Glamor
Then I became furious and told the new bosses boldly what I thought about their figure, eyes and hair. "What are your elegant shoulders, why do you hide them under jackets?" Well, and so on. One blushed a little, the other smiled tenderly, and the third gave a reserved look. But no one has ever stopped me: "You forget, Lieutenant!"
Superiors need to say compliments. Spit on all the rules, commandments and official etiquette. This is the "sunset of Europe" and the stupidity of feminists. Let them in Europe die of sexless boredom in their offices - Russian gentlemen love women openly, honestly, visibly.
"HOW IT IS CORRECT TO MAKE COMPLIMENTS TO THE CHIEF (AND GET THE INCREASE)", GQ
Ira has always won. She had more arguments, figures, comparisons. And logic. I was freaking out. Ira, moreover, had the exhausting manner of leading a dispute calmly, with a dismissive grin. Sometimes, already on edge, I was ready to cry out: "Yes, this is not a woman’s mind at all!" But fortunately, did not cry out. And then he consoled himself with one thing: Ira was ugly. “She has nothing to catch,” I argued vilely. “She doesn’t have a boyfriend. So she is having fun with books, politics, logic. Fool!”
I do not know what happened to the fate of Ira. Hope happily. She was a good girl. Only too clever, that's the trouble. Men shy away from such. Yes, that eschew - run like the devil from the incense.
"SMART BEAUTY - MEN'S NIGHTMARE", ALLURE
It is very clear why these columns exist, but this is no less sad. There are people who really think as the author writes (they say that he himself does not behave this way, but this does not change things). There are people who would like to behave this way, but something does not allow them, and they read these columns as material for fantasies. And there is a third category of success of these columns - all of us, who have now read his writings, got angry and indignant about this. Therefore, they write this Belyakov, and the websites order them to him. They are viral, they cause a "discussion." Media is justified, about as clickback and video with kittens.
And in fact - I am outraged by the attitude towards women, which is pronounced in his texts. This is an objectification in its purest form, reducing a woman to a beautiful trophy, which a man is free to control simply because he has a member, but a woman does not. The only relationships that can be truly healthy and beneficial are partnerships. These are the relationships that I built with my wife Dasha, and we can both realize our ambitions and support each other. Moreover, now I am learning a lot from her, because Dasha has her own business for three years already. If I were a man from the column of Belyakov, I would have cut her attempts at the root, and now I wouldn’t even have anyone to consult on the million questions that I have when I open my own business.
And these are the relationships that I build with my daughter Natasha. I do not want to indicate to her, I want to negotiate with her, to be for her not only authority, but also simply a person whom she trusts and on whom she can rely. But Belyakov cannot be trusted, much less relied upon. It's bad to be like this.
About women and sports:
Now, when the Olympics are taking place in Rio, I heard that the biggest TV-rating in Russia was scored - no, not at all what you thought. Not tennis. A female beach volleyball. And I am sure that the audience were entirely men. Because it is wildly sexy: girls in bathing suits jump, strong asses sparkle, a sight for sore eyes. And normal girls: not rolling, like swimmers, not drained, like runners. So let this one look remain in the Olympic program. I myself turn on the TV for these devils.
"How big sport kills women," Allure
Having seen enough of the twists of the body of my yoga girlfriend, I could not resist and - no, I did not take asanas side by side - I dragged her into the room on a large, large sofa. Both were satisfied with the joint exercises. Yes, citizens, from yoga, of course, a lot of benefits. Let the girls do, I do not mind.
"GIRLS IN YOGA: MEN'S OBSERVATIONS", ALLURE
Yes it is sex. Real sex. With 22 men at the same time. If you take a close-up shot of the face of a cheerleader during a disturbing game, it is easy to decide that she is undergoing a very long orgasm. Forty five minutes of orgasm. Plus added time. I think, here lies the mystery of the total female fanaticism. She may not understand what is offside, and why the corner. But she, tired of the big city, wildly wants sex, a protracted orgasm. And she gets it at least in this way. Ole-ole-ole! Girls, go ahead!
"GIRLS AND FOOTBALL: IT'S SEX!", ALLURE
Of course, I don’t want to blame someone for something, but the position of the author seems strange not only because I and most of my friends hold the opposite opinion, but also because of confusion in the testimony. When a person who considers himself a liberal declares: “This is the only way to be correct,” one hardly wants to believe all this. Generally, to be honest, we all need to forget these columns as soon as possible, as an unsuccessful school essay for which they put a two (forgive me for the sharpness). Сейчас объясню, почему. Налицо неосведомлённость в некоторых вопросах, например в спорте. Нужно отличать спортивные состязания от эротического видеоклипа. В противном случае стоит пожить некоторое время в режиме подготовки к марафону (или хотя бы к полумарафону) и посмотреть в глаза женщине, которая способна преодолеть такую дистанцию.
Я думаю, что популярность подобных высказываний кроется в устоявшихся товарно-денежных отношениях между мужчиной и женщиной, в которых каждый определяет для себя цель: один хочет заботы и внимания, второй - ужин и чистые носки. Or vice versa. The key to all this, probably, is self-sufficiency. If you want to better understand another person - learn to do what you want from him. And, probably, exactly at this moment the category “must” disappears and simple human relations begin.